I used to feel guilty for being who I am.
I am a U.S. citizen. I was born to two loving parents who worked hard to provide for their children. I have never had to worry about food or shelter. I have never been abused, raped, or neglected. I have a college education and have been privileged to travel to many different parts of the world.
Why?
Why me? Why did I laugh as a child while other children cried?
It is a question I long have struggled with, and yet, as I have grown, I have come to realize several things. First, no one has a perfect life. Even the rich. Especially the rich. Also, a comfortable life does not bring happiness. In a previous post I talked about the angst I felt when I realized I would not have a dryer or air-conditioning or heating in my apartment in Taiwan. No dryer? No air-conditioning? How would I survive?
Actually, I would. And not only that, I would thrive. I would revel in the fact that I could, in fact, adapt to my surroundings. I would realize that my heart swelled with pride because I didn’t actually need some of life’s “comforts” to get by.
But it’s more than that, too. With each station in life comes responsibility.
I attended a wedding shower a few years ago. It was held outdoors on a lovely spring day. The birds were chirping and the sun was shining; the bride-to-be was glowing. But my enjoyment of the event was ruined when, in passing, a lady said to me, “It’s okay—your turn will come.”
I was shocked. Really? My turn will come? Apparently being single and pursuing dreams other than a 3-bedroom home with a white picket fence was not her idea of success.
So then what is success? If the 29-year-old woman faking eye allergies (true story from my time as an ophthalmology assistant) is happy sitting at home collecting disability, should she be considered a success? She is, after all, happy.
Or is success about more than happiness just like happiness is about more than comfort?
To me success means recognizing who you are and where you come from and what you have to offer to the world—and then doing everything you can to make it happen. So you’re a bus driver and you’ll never swim in gold. So what? What kind of bus driver are you? How hard do you work? How do you treat the people around you? How much do you love? . . . Some women were meant to be housewives. I have friends who only ever wanted to be moms. Is there anything wrong with that? No! But is there anything wrong with the fact that I’m not like them? No!
Honestly, the world would be a lot better off if everyone would worry more about their own contribution to humanity—a.k.a. helping others and being the best person they can: taking risks and pushing themselves and picking themselves up when they fall—and less about . . . well, everything else.
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Stepping off soap box NOW.
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Note: During this next week I have to force myself to focus on my own “success” by working on some freelance articles I’ve been putting off. So, if I don’t post for a few days, that’s why! Thank you for your patience.
Images: Google and Pinterest
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Filed under: background, dreams, Hong Kong, life, love, personal, perspective, Taiwan Tagged: Air conditioning, bridal shower, Bus driver, Construction and Maintenance, dreams, Family, happiness, Mechanical, Mother Teresa, Picket fence, success, taiwan, wedding